Some Tips on How to Be Truly Heroic

Author’s Note: Hello, I’m The Overlord Bear, and here’s a new story series! Again! I guess this is a part of my warmup for writing other stories of mine…and speaking of writing stories, I’ve been thinking of what to write for my Creative Writing thesis recently too…

What, you think it’s too early for me to work on my college thesis? Hahaha…how easy do you think it is, fellow fools? O_O

Also, I made a new friend recently, and it’s a mop for the second floor of my house. Okay, I guess I’m now wasting your time here.

And again, I really really want honest constructive feedback, yo. If you’re gonna leave some, then there’s the comments section below.

Oh, and one more thing: I hope that you (special mention goes to the younger nutshellcrackers out there) are reading this with mature enough guidance.

1. Know how stupid you really are.

“Come on, you said that you’re unstoppable, right?”

I looked at the annoying brat.

He was on his knees, and I grinned at him.

That glare from him made me grin wider.

“You’re getting off from my pain, huh?” the brat said as he stood up, cracked iron sword in his right hand. “You’re a damn sadist, you know that?”

“My, my, what pride you have inside you,” I replied, grin growing along with my desire to laugh at this kid’s idiocy. “Are you really sure that you know everything?”

“IT’S DAMN OBVIOUS!”

I let him land a hit. Even if it was to my cheek, and even if it stung a lot. Gotta keep my pride down, even if doing that feels annoying.

“Kid, you forgot what I said before…”

…and I knew that the hit to my face and my pride was worth it when I saw him smirk and stop.

“I DON’T NEED A SWORD TO TEACH YOU LESSONS HERE!”

Punch to the gut. One hard punch to the kid’s gut. Not killer hard, of course. And considering past training sessions, he can survive a smashing through a bunch of trees.

“Guh!”

And then I saw another sign of progress when I saw his shocked face.

I like seeing that face…that face when a person realizes how weak they are…

The breaking trees added to the catharsis, but they added little, ’cause the chief’s gonna have us replace this.

Oh well, I like doing good for the environment.

I do hope that Chief won’t make me work today, though…

“FUCK YOU, SADIST!”

Oh look, self-righteous brat is back. And no sword too.

“TEACHERS LIKE YOU SHOULD GO TO HELL!”

He sure learned a lot from today’s “literature,” huh?

“AND I KNOW WHAT I’M DOING!”

Even though he chose to leave the rich kid life, I can still see some of its marks on him…

“Kid, you’re open.”

“Huh?”

Foot Up The Jewels.”

And then he got launched to the clear blue sky. No twinkling, though. Just a flying, screaming, unarmed boy in broken armor.

I’m pretty sure that he can survive that too, especially since I launched him to a tree-filled area.

Also, his scream is hilarious. I’ll admit that I like my secret technique’s name too.

I don’t know how far we’ve progressed, though, but I think the next proper course of action now is…

…to fall on my back…and close my eyes…and rest for a bit…

“I hope the Chief doesn’t force me to work right after this…” I mumbled as I felt more pain. “Though I guess I should work if I’m asked to…for the environment…but maybe until I faint…Chief isn’t that bad…”

2. Listen to your elders.

“What did I tell you about collateral damage, you idiots?”

“It’s this sadist’s fault!”

“It’s my fault and this kid’s fault too.”

Our fellow furcoated townspeople didn’t pay much mind to the short and hoarse old woman, the kinda taller and way younger (and brattier) boy, and the tired but smiling me.

“Blame game later, idiots!” the wrinkled but wise (seriously) old woman shouted back. “What did I tell you!?”

“We clean up our mess,” I quickly answered, followed by shooting a smile at the brat beside me.

Said brat raised his arms to form an X sign. “No, it’s your mess! You’re the teacher! I’m just the student!”

“Students will be teachers one day, dear student,” I told the brat while quoting the Chief in front of us. I smiled wider when I saw the Chief smile too. Us older people had smiles with ends that probably reached our ears when we saw the brat pale.

3. Never underestimate chores.

“Don’t we…huff…have…huff…magic…for this sort of thing…huff…huh?”

“I wish that we have magic for this sort of thing too, but unfortunately, no, we don’t have magic for this sort of thing.”

The brat screamed and then kicked a can holding a soil-surrounded seedling.

I frowned at that, but I still kept on digging and planting.

“Hey, you’re ruining the environment.”

“THE ENVIRONMENT CAN FIX ITSELF!”

“The environment looks like it can fix itself because there are people who are working for the good of it.”

“THEN WHY CAN’T WE LEAVE IT TO THEM!?”

“All humans are responsible for nature’s balance.”

“I’M NOT CUT OUT FOR THIS!”

“When you’re tired, you can’t do it well, of course.”

“AND YOU’RE TIRED TOO!”

“I haven’t fainted yet.”

“ARGH! FUCK THIS SHIT!”

And the brat stomped away, grumbling and screaming incoherently.

“…”

I’ll still work until I faint.

4. Get enough rest daily.

“Hey, kid.”

He didn’t respond…unless I counted his continued slashing with a wooden training sword at the wooden training dummy.

“You know, I think you can actually slice an arm off that if you go to sleep already and get enough sleep.”

He still kept on slashing…and groaning…and huffing…and puffing…but he still didn’t blow the dummy down.

“Training until you faint, then?”

“…no…”

Considering his growl as he tried to slash at the dummy, looks like he’s acting like one of those idiot heroes.

One part of me wants to stay awake here in the training hall and wait until this kid falls over, but another part of me wants to go to my more comfy bed already.

What should I–Oh wait, he fell asleep.

That’s a relief.

And my head feels like it’s falling…to the ground…

5. Form true friendships.

“Hey, old man.”

“Again, the ‘old man’ insult doesn’t offend me, kid, ’cause the valuable lessons that I learned while I aged are freaking worth it.”

“I don’t care. I still wanna call you ‘old man.'”

I opened my eyes, raising an eyebrow along with them.

I had to blink my eyes while they adjusted to the sudden rays of sunlight, though…

But anyway…

“Are you respecting me, kid?” I asked with a grin.

And then there’s his usual glare. I feel like jumping and dancing childishly while I looked at his amusing expression, but my body still feels heavy, and I’d probably drive him away from training more with me if I pissed him off again.

“You’re still annoying, old man, but I’ll admit: I learned some good things yesterday.”

He looked away, blushing, and then he looked down, face going more serious.

“I spent some time thinking after I woke up today. I still wanna be a hero, but I guess I can’t be one all alone, huh? And I’m still weak…and dumb…ugh…”

Ah, I love humility.

“Yeah,” I answered as I tried to sit up. “I was an idiot too…when I was a kid…Bunch of older people…had to smack lessons into me…”

A hand held one of mine, and I was able to stand up, although I felt wobbly.

Fortunately, the kid kept on supporting me.

“It’s damn obvious, old man.”

He’s still cheeky, though.

“Well, we should overcome that through more training, then!” I enthusiastically replied.

He glared at me again.

“Not the physical sort, of course,” I added, smiling more gently. “Physical training isn’t the only training that we need to do, you know.”

And we went out, smiling while meeting the relaxing air of our mountainside town.

6. Bad is not good (duh, but we humans forget that at times too).

“It’s over, you monster!”

“Whoa there!”

Block with my own sword!

“What!?”

Alright!

“ARE YOU GOING SENILE, OLD MAN!?”

“Hey, we wanna help humanity be better, kid.”

“That’s what I was gonna do!” He pointed his sword at the defeated man behind me. “That guy killed a nation! And that’s just the tip of the shit-filled iceberg!”

Wow. Just…wow. I’m speechless…kinda. More shocked than speechless, definitely. Hm, maybe more annoyed than shocked. Brat’s reaction isn’t that surprising from a human, really.

“Kid, this guy regretted his whole world domination scheme after seeing the people he cared about go insane ’cause of the mass-produced God Stone things that he and his fellow chumps were using,” I told the brat while I sat on the blackened bricks beside the catatonic tyrant. “And I knew that after breaking the shit that was messing with his head.”

I then pointed at the broken gray stones scattered all over the large room…all over the unconscious bodies of our enemies.

“By the way, not killing them is damn tough,” I complained. “Feels worth it, though.”

The brat glared at me again.

I won’t admit this out loud, but I’m having some doubts about the recovery of all these knocked-out people…

…and then I remembered a bunch of years of my life.

So I shrugged and said:

“Well, let’s just do our best. We humans are not perfect, but we can do good stuff.”

Brat still glared at me for a few seconds, and then he sighed in exasperation as he reached a hand out to me.

“I can’t believe I’m going along with you and your crazy plan,” he muttered after I took his hand.

“Some of the ‘crazy plans’ are the truly good plans, kid. Our stupidity makes the truly good look bad at times.”

The boy sighed again and replied:

“And that’s something I can agree with…but those other idiots, though…”

Oh yeah, speaking of our fellow foolish comrades…

7. Family, friends, loved ones–they are all freaking important (and we humans forget that at times too, unfortunately).

“What makes you think you have the right to tell us what to do, knight?”

Wow. Again, facepalming seems appropriate to one side of me, but considering this fool’s personality, facepalming will probably cause unnecessary trouble.

Fortunately, I have a genius idea.

“Wha—Hey!”

My fellow knights pointed their weapons at me, with the Commander growling loudly as he went near my face, but all of them were like one ant bite to me, surprisingly.

I’m damn chill, alright. And now, I should use the chill well.

“See, your daughter here, she’s important to you, right?” I asked, grinning while I put the blade of my sword to the daughter’s neck.

“She is my pride and joy, so let her go and let me give you Hell.”
“Yeah, you’re angry that I’m threatening your daughter. Now, I may not have what we all call a normal family, ’cause they’re all dead, but I have people who care for me, and they work similarly to how a proper family should work.”
“I advise you to stop testing my patience, knave,” Commander growled with a lower tone, pointing the barrel of his gun closer to my forehead. More painful than an ant bite, but still manageable.

“Long story short, violence and hating people doesn’t help humanity, and nobody wants a sad, especially dead, loved one.”

Tall and muscular Commander went silent for a bit, and then…

“Hah, who cares about those genocidal bastards?”

I gave him a silent grin in return.

“Are you trying to become a traitor?” Commander growled again, eye twitching in anger.

“No,” I quickly answered. “I don’t support genocide, but I do support the good in all of us. Surely, you wouldn’t throw your daughter away if you saw good in her, even if she did a very bad thing, right?”

At that, Commander went silent…and then he growled in annoyance and looked away.

“You handle those bastards, then,” he told me, and I let go of the girl…

“Ow!”

…who also used Foot Up The Jewels.

I’m too tough to be launched up the sky, but I still felt pain in my crotch…

“Maybe you’ll be annoyed by this, but I think you deserved that,” my protege told me.

8. Remember that there are bad differences and that there are good differences.

“I am not well-versed…in dealing with women…” I squeaked while I held my crotch. Damn, it feels freaking painful! Women…what mysteries, indeed…

“Wanna be taught about them, then?” my smirking student asked. “I was trained by a woman too, you know. I can show you a lot about how awesome they are, especially with their help.”

I felt like I was being insulted, but that stupid feeling got crushed quickly.

“Teach me…Master…”

I want to get married already…and have kids of my own…and, well, honestly, I mainly wanna have some fun with a pretty woman…especially after all this crap…Why do women hate me? Why?

“Hey, Ma’am! You should date this old man here!”

And he calls her “Ma’am”!? While I’m “old man”!?

“I’m feeling…very offended…right now…ow…”

“Oh, he is an old man. Old as me?”

Her words hurt, but her voice sounds hot.

“Yeah,” my student answered. “I’m sure you’ll get along!”

As I rolled on the floor, I saw the most beautiful woman in the world. Scary-looking, especially with her armor and weapons, but daaaammmmmnnnnnn…

“So beautiful–but ow, my crotch…”

“Compliments on my physical appearance are gladly received, but they are not enough if you wish to be that close with me.”

“Feel free…feel free to teach me, Ma’am…owww…”

“Sheesh, old man…I’ll leave him to you then, Ma’am. You’re the best teacher when it comes to stuff about women, see.”

Why am I feeling a chill when that brat went out?

“Hey, brat, where are you going?”

“Don’t worry, she may not be perfect, but she’s freaking awesome!”

“Are you sure!?”

And then he shrugged, leaving me with a colder chill, while saying:

“We humans are not perfect, but we can do good stuff!”

Hm, fair point.

“So, I heard that you wish to help in redeeming our defeated enemies,” she suddenly spoke.

“Yes…why?”

I had a growing grin when I answered.

“I would like to offer my help in that effort,” she answered with a smile.

She’s the most beautiful woman in the world, indeed.

Life is beautiful, indeed.

“Will you…marry me…?”

“Hm, it is too early for that. I will have to decline. I am open to dating you, though.”

“Sorry…and thank you…”

9. The road to Hell is paved by selfishness.

“I think you should be gentler.”

“Yeah, old man, you should be gentler with training.”

“Waaaah!”

“This girl needs to know that life’s tough,” I tried to justify.

“And you should know that we humans have limits as well,” said my wife.

“You’re becoming senile, old man,” my first student/adopted son added.

“Waaaah!” cried the little girl that I trained too hard.

I groaned. At everyone. Myself included.

“Okay…I’m sorry…this damn rough training style has hurt many people…but wasn’t it effective, boy?”

It was effective! It’s okay to use it a lot…right?

“Yeah…but it doesn’t work for everyone, and it doesn’t work all the time, old man.”

“And your rigidity is one reason of the people who wish to kill you.”

I cringed…but they do have good points…

10. Live a life of learning and improvement.

“Hey…son…”

“Yeah, Dad?”

“How…how was my life? I don’t…I don’t remember a lot, see…”

“You were awesome. You were stupid too, but you had awesome moments. Lots of awesome moments.”

“I see…I think I’m remembering a lot of them now too…How about your mother?”

“Biological? Or adoptive?”

“Wait…you’re adopted?”

“You and Mom adopted me after you two got married.”

“Oh…I’m sorry for forgetting…I guess I’m a senile old man now, huh?”

“Yeah…but don’t worry so much, Dad. I hate that you forgot, but I still love you. Mom still loves you too. And you just showed me why Mom and I still love you, you know.”

“I see…that’s great…”

“Want me to call Mom?”

“Sure. Wake me up when you’re back. I’m feeling sleepy right now…”

“Alright. Oh, and Dad?”

“Yeah?”

“I don’t know what’s in the afterlife, but…please watch over me and my family, okay?”

“…”

“…Dad?”

“…of course, you brat…”

“…”

“…”

“Hahaha…thanks. Love you, Dad.”


Next Story in this Series: [I hope that you update this in the future, Tobby]

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