A More Fun Work Web at the Lab
a prompted short story by The Overlord Bear/Jem De Ocampo
Prompt (from r/WritingPrompts): “you are a scientist that works for an organization. They experiment with genetically modified spiders, and have forced you to work with a very annoying assistant. One day, while your assistant is being annoying, one of the spiders yells ‘shut the fuck up, Daryl!’”
“So, Sir, you see, since you’re so annoying, too, I decided to take some of your drool from your pillow – because come on, that’s the only place where you’re ever dirty – and combine and modify your DNA with this spider’s here. And look, it didn’t die! It even talks! So, you gonna give me a shred of that respect you were being stingy about now?”
I’m not even wondering about how my annoying assistant Daryl managed to get a DNA sample from me. And I will give him respect. But I think my new daughter/best friend Lan, with the new swell on her back that provides her adorably squeaky human voice, expresses my feelings there way better than I can.
“Only shred you’re gonna get is from tissue paper, asshole!”
What a blessing in disguise.
Author’s Note: Been around a year since I last did this sort of stuff, and I’ve been struggling to figure out what to do for the first three posts here this month, so hey, why not make this sort of stuff again? Also, I’m in the mood for something short and hilarious, alright.